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Signs of the times

On a Septic Tank Truck in Oregon -- Yesterday's Meals on Wheels


On a Septic Tank Truck sign -- We're #1 in the #2 business.


Sign over a Gynecologist's Office -- Dr. Jones, at your cervix.


At a Proctologist's door -- To expedite your visit please back in.


On a Plumber's truck -- We repair what your husband fixed.


On a Plumber's truck -- Don't sleep with a drip. Call your Plumber.


Pizza Shop Slogan -- 7 days without pizza makes one weak.


At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee -- Invite us to your next blowout.


On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door -- Hello. Can we pick your nose?


At a Towing company -- We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.


On an Electrician's truck -- Let us remove your shorts.


In a Nonsmoking Area -- If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.


On a Maternity Room door -- Push. Push. Push.


At an Optometrist's Office -- If you don't see what you're looking for you've come to the right place.


On a Taxidermist's window -- We really know our stuff.


In a Podiatrist's office -- Time wounds all heels.


On a Fence -- Salesmen welcome!


Dog food is expensive -- At a Car Dealership.


The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment.


Outside a Muffler Shop -- No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.


In a Veterinarian's waiting room -- Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!


At the Electric Company -- We would be delighted if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be.


In a Restaurant window -- Don't stand there and be hungry, Come on in and get fed up.


In the front yard of a Funeral Home -- Drive carefully. We'll wait.


At a Propane Filling Station, Thank heaven for little grills.


And don't forget the sign at a Chicago Radiator Shop -- Best place in town to take a leak.


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